Sunday, April 13, 2008

April 11, 2008



There’s been a lot of exciting news vying for front page coverage in the local papers this past week, the strangest of which dealt with the possibility of tearing down the Gran Venetian. Yes, you read right, and it was no April Fools’ Day joke either!

When my business partner was living here in Vallarta, he always used to ask me, every day, «So… What’s in the funny papers today?» He knew I read the local papers from front to back, while he never quite mastered the language. I still remember that daily question, especially when the headlines scream something like «Will They Demolish Them?» In huge letters. With truly scathing political cartoons inside.

The whole thing refers to the Gran Venetian, the twin tower complex built on one side of the mouth of the Pitillal river. The three-tower Peninsula complex is on the other side.

The present administration has initiated a number of legal proceedings over the last year and a half with regard to the more than 160 building permits the former mayor and his henchman, the then head of the permits department, issued during the last 15 days of his administration. Each uses a different basis, some use the alleged illegal change in zoning regulations, others use other reasons. In this particular case, accusations have been flying around from the get go.
Based on my own experience, I find the whole thing laughable. I believe that absolutely nothing will come of all these judicial proceedings and months of paperwork. After all, my neighbor’s truly, proven, illegal construction has been shut down, clausurado, no less than five times. He’s got a whole bunch of lawsuits pending against him, and yet nothing has been done. I’ve been told that he’s got friends at City Hall, which is why no ruling has been made by the judge handling the cases.

The whole thing is oh so similar to our friend Brenda Martin’s situation. Very sad.

To follow up, it appears that they’re going to shut down no less than FIVE construction sites, including the controversial Nima Bay at the entrance to Marina Vallarta, and Tres Mares (also in the Marina), the four 25-story condo towers complex advertised in those huge billboards all over the main road to Vallarta. The charges against the latter are based on alleged illegal change of zoning, claiming that it is being built on a property designated as «tourist-hotel», and that it is higher than allowed by law.

And then there’s the scandal caused by the recent death of that young man. They actually caught the shooter, jailed him …and he escaped, purportedly to the North Shore, i.e. Nuevo Vallarta. Last Wednesday, the commander of the Bahia de Banderas AFI (similar to the American FBI) was found shot to death in Nuevo Vallarta. They say the assassin fled to Puerto Vallarta.

On this side of the Ameca River, everyone’s being fired, everyone’s got someone to accuse, and our poor Mayor doesn’t seem to know which way to turn in order to come out of this shameful situation …cleanly. Ohmygoodness.

But enough of this political whatever-you-wanna-call-it.

There are other things that are much more enjoyable, things that make us smile, the reasons why we still love living here ...and continue to do so. Little things like my friend’s excited phone call last week, to let me know that they’ve gotten all kinds of goodies at Rizo’s supermarket, items like sharp cheddar cheese and all sorts of Kosher meats from the U.S. - hot dogs, pastrami, etc.

Little things like learning of a restaurant that one has never heard of, and looking forward to trying it out. Little things like the deelicious soups and the dumplings with peanut sauce at "Wok & Roll", Ms. Thuy’s Vietnamese restaurant way out there, near the airport. Mid-size things like the fact that Seapal, the water company, has finally come of age, into the cyberspace age. It was the last utility whose bills could not be paid online. Now they can.

Big things? Yes, like having one's children and grandchildren come down for a visit looking pale, and tired, and leaving revitalized, happy and healthy... Like all the wonderful people who come to our Charity Bingo nights and those who adopt the furries at the Public Library every Saturday... Like those who attended the Vallarta Verde event on the island... Like the new tenant in my neighbor’s condo, the young exchange med student doing a stage at the new Regional Hospital, who just delivered his first baby the other day. Boy, was he excited! What made me even happier –aside from his exuberant pride- was his description of what is now a new, clean, air-conditioned facility …instead of the run-down, decrepit building that was the old Regional Hospital. Also, there are those awesome yellow blooms on the primavera trees...

And then there’s the weather! In one email, Paco Ringness, the gifted singer featured in that fabulous show, Dolly Would If Kenny Could, whose run was extended due to popular demand, wrote: «Has anyone else noticed the weather change, about two days ago??? It was like the time changed and POOF! Summer’s here! I still can’t get over how fast the change happened. Our fan’s on for the first time this season!» Couldn’t have said it better myself.That’s all for now, folks. Have a super week, spring is here and it’s gettin’ HOT! Take care of yourselves and of each other. Hasta luego. pvmom04@yahoo.com

posted by Anna Reisman @ 4:01 PM 0 Comments

April 4, 2008


Well, we’ve finally caught up to the rest of the world - time-wise that is. And I just realized that we forgot to warn our readers in last week’s issue that this past Sunday, April 6th, at 2 a.m. to be exact, was when the long awaited change would take place. I hope it didn’t cause anyone too much inconvenience. In any case, I’m glad the confusion is over. It’s been very strange to be two hours behind the east coast and only one ahead of the west one for the last six weeks.


Before we set aside the topic of April Fools’ Day for another year, there’s a little story I’d like to share with you in the hope that it will give you a chuckle as it did with me.


A few years ago, the Director of the Tribune received a very interesting phone call. Sr. Procoro was the General Director back then, when we first published the article that was reprinted in last week’s issue (April Fools’ Day) of the Tribune. As soon as the paper hit the streets, he was contacted by some high up exec of Seapal (they’re the folks who run the potable water and sewage treatment plants in Vallarta). This gentleman was extremely upset at the article entitled «Dangerous Chemical Found in Puerto Vallarta» on December 28th, 2005 - The Día de los Inocentes. Now you may remember that the Día de los Inocentes is the equivalent of our April Fools’ Day. This was clearly explained at the very beginning of the issue. In addition, the author of that article -and a few others sprinkled throughout the paper- was a certain «John Innocent». As you may have noted last week, the «dangerous chemical» mentioned in the title of the controversial (?) article in question referred to water, H2O, a.k.a. dihydrogen monoxide in chemical terms… pure water. Anyways, once I had explained - i.e.: translated - the article to our director, he got as good a laugh from it as I did. I never did find out how his subsequent conversation with the exec went, but that’s what happens when people who are not fluent in a particular language jump to conclusions…


When I went back to our archives to find the original article, I came across the following:
«Good news: according to an article published in the media last week, one of the municipal Department of Culture’s eleven New Year resolutions involves «a new distribution of information strategy to increase the potential of spreading cultural information in our town». Manuel Santana Encarnación, head of the Department, considers that the point «will receive more attention»… I sure hope it means that they will notify the «foreign» media of the events they have planned with a little more than 4½ hours’ notice. That would be super.» That was over two years ago and we’re still waiting.


We just received the April newsletter from our sometime contributor, Barbara Peters, owner of Galería Vallarta. In it, among other interesting tidbits, she writes: «Be sure to go to the Isla Rio Cuale on Sunday, April 6, for an all day concert by various musical groups dedicated to ecology and the preservation of the few green areas we have left in the downtown area … The group hopes to stop further encroachment of vendor stands on the island - which have ruined the former peaceful walk through a park-like area on the island. Why we need more vendor stands which all sell the same stuff and are unfair competition to stores who pay rent, taxes, social security, utility bills and wages is beyond me, especially since they do not sell for less than established stores and do not mark their prices.»


Well said, friend! I hope many of you attended the event, and I hope the residents of this beautiful town will do what must be done in order to preserve that one and only green space left in the heart of town.


A propos, I happened to stumble upon an updated Google Earth satellite map of Vallarta, much clearer than the previous one. What made me smile was that the person who did it must have taken for granted that streets in this town were similar to those in other towns, i.e. grid-like and continuous. Unfortunately, such is not the reality (which is one of the reasons why I moved here to start with). Streets on the south side stop when they meet a cliff and then continue on the next level up - sometimes with the same name, and sometimes not. Some streets continue in a totally different section, as if the two or three blocks -or the mountain- in between, did not exist. But that is how it is.


Anyways, getting back to Google’s version of this part of the Earth, its Puerto Vallarta map has those streets running uninterrupted from the shore all the way up the mountain. Heaven help those visitors who decide to print out that map to use while they’re here… They’re sure to get hopelessly lost, just as we did when we first moved here and believed in the maps we were given.


And about traffic… Now that the madness of the Easter holidays is over, the town has returned to its normal status, we can find parking spots, the ambiance is quieter, and once again, the breathtaking primavera trees are showing off their amazingly bright yellow blooms all over town, along with their companions, the amapas trees. They’re the ones with the big pink blooms. Now, all we have to do is relax for the next few weeks, when the hoopla will start all over with the traditional festivals, festivities and holidays of the month of May.Until then, I wish you a fabulous week, stay healthy and happy. Hasta luego. Email me at pvmom04@yahoo.com

posted by Anna Reisman @ 3:57 PM 0 Comments

March 28, 2008


As I’ve mentioned on various occasions in the past, there are times when the Muse just doesn’t come to visit me. This week happens to be one of those times.

So much has been happening that I haven’t even had time to make notes about what I would like to share with you, as I usually do. (I can’t depend on my memory any more…)

Occupancy in the town was at 100% for the last couple of weeks, so I didn’t leave the house except to go to the vet’s for some pet food. And the newspapers were busy reporting all that hoopla, along with the usual political back-and-forth accusations.

Other headlines that gave me a chuckle this past week were: "Residents and businessmen of Colonia Emiliano Zapata refuse relocation of vendors" (that part I have left to my colleague Francisco, so that you may read his take on one particular aspect of it), "Civil servants training to separate waste products" (i.e. organic vs. inorganic), and the one to top it all off: "Fountain in Plaza Pitillal may disappear".

Now you may recall that I’ve mentioned a few times that the trees they planted on the cement slab that covers the underground parking garage built where Pitillal’s pretty main square used to be …were dying, like the ones along the extension of the Malecon. Now the trees look a little better, but it appears that the fountain that was installed there never worked. The local delegate said that they were thinking of removing it as it was «not well built from the get go, no filters, etc., and it would cost too much to do all that is necessary for it to work». Hmmm… seems like a déjà vu, doesn’t it?

The politic-ese language baffles me. I truly believe that all politicians, regardless of the country, must attend the same school, where they are taught to speak for a long time – without saying anything. Amazing!

Before I become really nasty, I think I’d better change the topic, sort of. It’s about the trees, the primavera (with the gorgeous bright yellow blooms) and the amapas (with the pink blooms) to be exact. The former bloomed in February, lost their blooms, and now I’ve seen them blooming – again! That’s a first. I couldn’t explain it if I tried.

Aren’t anniversaries fun? Imagine, eleven years! Geez, and to think that I’ve been there since shortly before its beginnings… Wow, time sure flies when you’re living in "paradise", don’t it?

Have a wonderful week, dear readers, and don’t let yourself be «fool»ed – either with what you read, or anything else this Tuesday – except for Bingo. That’s on for real, on Tuesday. See you there! pvmom04@yahoo.com

posted by Anna Reisman @ 3:49 PM 0 Comments

March 21, 2008


Before my memory fails me completely, I do want to tell you some of the things I wanted to share with you last week - before receiving Mr. Rusnell’s disturbing article on our friend, Brenda Martin’s, situation. I’ll get back to that later.

The first thing I wanted to mention was, as I had written the previous week, that I had been invited to attend THE event of the year, Puerto Vallarta’s revered Becas Ball. This is –to the best of my knowledge- the only event that attracts all the upper crust of both local Vallartans and foreigners (which is without doubt the reason for which I’d never been invited until this time, just because my friend had an extra ticket…)

This year’s edition was held at the Westin Resort & Spa in Marina Vallarta, on the Los Arcos Patio, outside, by the shore. The place was packed, the décor superb, and the band and its singer … fabulous. What I did not know as I was madly foraging for anything that wasn’t a sundress in what I call my «Montreal boxes» (stuff that I brought down 14 years ago and never use), was that 1) the event would be held outside, and 2) that our usually welcomed «cool ocean breeze» would turn into gusts of something akin to a stingingly cold, Canadian-like nor’easter. Some of the ladies obviously knew, as they kept relatively warm, elegantly wrapped in beautiful shawls.

A professional auctioneer, Mr. Nathan Clakley of Walnut Creek, CA, was hired to conduct the auction. He climbed upon the huge disco-like stage set up in the middle of the Patio, surrounded by tables on three sides, with the raised stage at the head. Accompanying him was an older Mexican gentleman whom we were told would act as translator.

My companion and I were seated at a table with five other couples, folks we had never met before. All really fun people, and obviously with the means to bid on everything up for auction – which they did.

Mr. Clakley was very verbose in his welcoming statement. He then handed the microphone over to the Mexican gentleman, who said, in Spanish: «Ummm… welcome to everyone,» and gave the mike back to the MC, who then spoke about how much he values and respects the work and accomplishments of the Becas Vallarta organization, how wonderful it was that the students would go to school, go home, study and go to bed - instead of getting involved in unsavory occupations, and so on. The Mexican gentleman was handed the mike once again, and this time he translated the lengthy speech as: «Ummm… students go home and go to bed.» Trying to stifle my laughter, I whispered what had just happened to my companion, who doesn’t understand Spanish. A lovely lady from North Carolina who was seated at our table overheard me. She burst out laughing, so I had to tell the others that the «interpreter» either didn’t understand English, couldn’t remember everything Mr. Clakley said, or was just lazy. It really was very funny, and we all had a good laugh, but I felt bad for those guests who didn’t understand English either, as what Mr. Clakley said was very nice indeed, and most complimentary. The auction itself was not translated for them at all.

I hope you all spent a wonderful St. Patrick’s Day, but for many of us, the date will always carry a sad memory as it is the day on which our friend Mary Sue Morris left this earthly plane, a year ago. Rest in peace, Mary Sue.

Without any intention of encroaching on Ronnie Bravo’s specialty, there is one little thing I’d like to share with you… From time to time, when I want to check my email on Yahoo!, I find that I cannot get into my «inbox». I usually surf with Explorer, but when that happens, I get out of that one and switch to Mozilla. When I did that today, and attempted to check my email on Yahoo!, this is the message I got:
«Can’t talk now. System’s down. Sorry for the holdup. Looks like a temporary glitch in our network has part of Yahoo! mail down, so you’re briefly without service. Rest assured the alarms are blaring in the basement and our team is working frantically to get you up and running ASAP. Again, the snag is on our end — so there’s no need for you to do a thing.
Back to it,
Yahoo! Mail Team»

Now, I find that to be very nice, considerate, on their part. Why wouldn’t they post the same thing on Explorer?

Having spent time with Mr. Steve Wozniak, the inventor of the Apple Computer and co-founder of Apple Inc. last week (see separate article), the story of Michael Nygard’s airport experience last week made me chuckle. It appears that Mr. Nygard, a computer programmer, was pulled aside and made to sit in the holding area. He watched as a gaggle of TSA workers examined his things, especially his laptop ... «‘There’s no drive,’ one said. ‘And no ports on the back. It has a couple of lines where the drive should be,’ she continued...» As you’ve probably guessed, Michael’s MacBook Air had them all baffled. Fortunately, a younger member of the team eventually arrived and explained that it’s not a «device», but a computer with a solid state hard drive. So here’s a warning to anyone traveling with a MacBook Air: schedule a few extra minutes for the airport.

Everyone’s been talking about the «new kid» in town - Coconuts. This is a restaurant located where Palacio Oriental used to be, at the corner of Lazaro Cardenas and Constitucion. If you haven’t tried it yet, go for it! Good, down home southern cooking, all prepared on the spot, from scratch, country fried steak or chicken, fish, bar-b-q’d ribs, fresh breads - corn, basil, parmesan garlic… Fried green tomatoes (yes, the real thing), collared greens, creamed spinach, hush puppies, etc. etc. Different all-you-can-eat specials every day, nice, soothing décor, and really friendly, attentive service …plus very reasonable prices! The place has already become a favorite among many of us locals, and it’s only been open for a little over a month, so reservations are now recommended: 141-0313 to speak to John, the owner, or 131-8808 for his partner, Seth.

Now that we are under new management at the Tribune, with Sr. Eduardo Navarrete as Managing Director, I have to drive out there again, once a week. Originally, this talented young man from Mexico City had scheduled the meetings for 9 a.m., but when I explained the traffic situation to him, he was kind enough to move them to 11 a.m.

At the best of times, the traffic along the Libramiento bypass depends entirely on its intersection with Francisco Villa Avenue, a.k.a. Hell Corner. It can take up to a full 15 minutes, no kidding, to cross it because of the strange lights system. And what makes it even worse are the drivers who find themselves stuck right in the middle of that godawful place, with nowhere to go. Everyone’s an optimist, believing that the line will move enough to get them out of the way… Never happens. Also, if you are daring enough to drive around these weeks, be careful with those radar traps. They’re everywhere. But if someone comes to your window as you’re sitting there seething, and asks you for a contribution to the Red Cross, please, please, give them something. The local Red Cross is grossly underfunded and it truly needs our help!

I wish you all a most Happy Easter, a wonderful holiday in our unusually cool little paradise, and please, stay out of trouble with the authorities!

Regarding our friend Brenda, the Mexican courts have declared that there will be no change in her situation pending the judge’s decision AFTER her trial. And heaven only knows when that will be. This has turned into a major international affair, broadcast as the No. 1 story on the national newscasts in Canada. Not good. Not for Mexico, not for Canada, and most of all, not for Brenda.
Hasta luego. pvmom04@yahoo.com

posted by Anna Reisman @ 3:43 PM 0 Comments

March 14, 2008

The news concerning our friend Brenda Martin is so bad that instead of telling you about my insignificant adventures this week, I used "my" space to update everyone who knew this lady -and those who didn’t- as to the behavior of both the Canadian and Mexican governments in her case.
I cannot publish it in this blog as I do not wish to violate any copyright laws.

posted by Anna Reisman @ 3:37 PM 0 Comments